The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #10 - Men, Women, and Children by Chad Kultgen

Rarely does an audience get to witness the evolution of a writer, and rarely is such an evolution carried out so artfully.  With most authors settling into a niche or a particular way of telling a story, it's so easy to just do what you've been doing.  While the subject matter of Men, Women & Children: A Novel isn't new to Chad Kultgen, the scope of the story is.  With The Average American Male: A Novel, Kultgen started with first person, singular focus.  With The Lie: A Novel, he stayed with first person storytelling, but told the stories of three different characters.  With Men, Women & Children: A Novel, he makes the jump to the third person and utilizes even more characters.  Even more of a change of pace is the fact that instead of using characters that are college aged, he decides to explore his recurring themes of sexuality (and its influence on social interaction) with the two demographics he's steered clear of...Middle Schoolers and Middle Agers.  The result might be a little uneven (and a little underwhelming when compared to The Lie: A Novel) and a little redundant (when compared to the themes of Tom Perrotta's Little Children: A Novel) but nevertheless this new work shows that it's an exciting time to be a Kultgen fan.

Through the course of a school Football season we are told the stories of five families: the Mooneys, the Trubys, the Beltmeyers, the Clints, and the Vances.  Each family has their own story and their own issues to deal with.  The Mooneys are a Father and Son who are (in their own ways) dealing with the divorce/departure of the Mother in the family.  The Trubys have grown sexually stale and ultimately start to think about infidelity.  Mrs. Beltmeyer has a tight grip on her daughter Brandy, though not as tightly as she'd like; while Mrs. Clint seems to be the polar opposite of Mrs. Beltmeyer in terms of her daughter's interactions.  Finally, the Vances are having that age old debate: to vasectomy or not to vasectomy.  Through all of these stories, there is one connecting thread...the theme of sexuality and the Internet.  Each family in their own way touches on how computing in the modern age has made us more accessible, while making us drift more apart.  People have affairs through websites, children (and sometimes their parents) post provocative pictures of themselves on the Net for all to see, and Sexting is a second language.  All modern times for modern problems, and Kultgen doesn't shy away from being able to transition from one story to another, even intermingling some of his threads into each other.

Which brings up the ultimate criticism when evaluating this book:  it's about high time for Kultgen to either turn this novel into a franchise, or start with a new canvas and tell an epic story, particularly because this book seems to just end out of nowhere.  This is still a good book, but again it ultimately pales in comparison with The Lie: A Novel, particularly because Men, Women & Children: A Novel feels it could go on for another fifty pages and finish out the school year.  It most likely does so because the author has built a reputation for not letting any of his characters get out clean.  This reputation pretty much leads the reader to automatically assume that by the end of the course of events, there will be blood on everyone's hands.  Indeed, the final scene of the book is something akin to a P.T. Anderson film.  It ends abruptly, and with a shock; which ultimately makes for a finished product that feels like it's leading to another installment.

Another difference between this book and the author's previous work is that there's actually a pair of characters you want to see make it out with a measure of happiness.  The fact that he let them get away with the happiness they did is the only real aspect of this book that kicks the reader in the shin, otherwise everyone pretty much does what his previous protagonists have done.  Hearts and minds are broken, sadness prevails over sentimentality, and in the end everyone continues to cope with themselves.  Overall, it's par for the course; while at the same time it shows off just how versatile of an author Kultgen really is.

Up Next: Carte Blanche by Jeffrey Deaver

The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #9 - Pygmy by Chuck Palahniuk

Note: This is the second of five reviews in the Author Appreciation series, which is currently showcasing the work of Chuck Palahniuk.

Pygmy is probably one of the most brutal openers a book could ever deliver.  Within the first 19 pages we're introduced to our anti-hero character of no name (Pygmy is the handle folks around those parts brand him with) who is part of a sleeper cell of agents assigned with nothing short of the destruction of America.  Operation Havoc is their end game, an attack that will throw the nation into its final throes.  Millions are to be killed, and the entire culture subverted by any means nessicary. One major problem standing in their way...they're only about 13 years old.  The source of the brutality? Our main character (one of those 13 year old spies), who has just violated someone in a way that cannot be described in polite company.


While the dust jacket says it's, "The Manchurian Candidate meets South Park", I'd like to suggest that it's more along the lines of Fight Club meets Pinky and the Brain. (A lot of the humor is derived from Pygmy's broken English observations of our culture and our interactions with each other.)  Palahniuk has basically taken Tyler Durden's appetite for social destruction and married it to The Brain's constant mindset of, "God, what are these idiots around me doing?  I better play along, lest my true intentions be known".  It is with that combination in play that our protagonist leads us on an operation that evokes the memory of a not too dissimilar "Project Mayhem", except with fewer soliders and no bitch tits.

As a matter of fact, one could easily think of  Pygmyas the illegitimate sequel to Fight Club, something that the book can both trumpet and be less than proud of.  Even with its younger characters, alternate setting, and even the presense of a detailed backstory for our comrade of glorious revolution; it still manages to sometimes come off as Jack's Smirking Revenge part II.  One could even argue that Palahniuk has this obsession with tearing the walls of Humanity apart commercial by commercial, and leaving it to fend for itself in a barren wasteland where once was a proud people.  But that's only if you let yourself get caught up in the trap of comparison.  Similarities aside, this is still a work that's relevant to our modern times.  Even more so now as we wrestle with the logic of just what makes a terrorist, what makes a Freedom Fighter, and when we should celebrate or mourn their death.  (Be it literal or symbolic.)  Rest assured, this is an entertaining read where you will laugh, you will be offended, and you will sympathize with the enemy.

Up Next: Book Two in the Palahniuk Appreciation Series, Haunted

The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #8 - Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk

Note: This is the first of five reviews in the Author Appreciation series, which is currently showcasing the work of Chuck Palahniuk.

It's so good to be reading Palahniuk again.  Honestly, the man's one of the best authors of his time and he continues to be consistently entertaining, whether he blows your mind or doesn't.  That's not saying that his non-mind blowing works are less inferior, it's just that Chuck focuses on one of two things: the characters or the plot.  Snuff is one of those books where he focuses more on the characters, and in his doing so he makes the actual plotting seem more interesting than it would under more traditional story telling methods.

Cassie Wright wants to die...or at least that's what it seems like when she agrees to film a 600 man gang bang in a bid to secure her position in the annals of Porn Star history.  What began with a casting call lead to a room of 600 guys standing around: primping, preening, preparing, and waiting for their shot with Ms. Wright.  Throughout the day's events we're privy to four perspectives:

- Mr. 600, aka Branch Bacardi: One of Cassie's former co-stars, also looking for a boost.

- Mr. 137, aka Dan Banyan: A washed out TV star who wants to jump start his career after some sordid rumors.

- Mr. 72: a kid wants to save his mother...who's performing in the room upstairs from him.

- Sheila: the talent wrangler who put this whole show together.

Each individual contributes a rather interesting piece to the overall plot of the book, which isn't all that complex, really.  Where the complexity, and the beauty of the story, comes in is with the characters.  We see Mr. 600 reminisce about the old days and how he deals with aging.  Mr. 72's coming to terms with some rather messed up family issues, and ultimately try to resolve the impotence caused by them.  Mr. 137 talks about how fame's fickle finger found him, and how it threatens to leave him due to his life choices to chase it.  And Sheila...well Sheila's the only person who knows what's really going on, and she's playing it close to the clipboard.  Through these four people, we get to know Cassie Wright.  Her life, her times, and her ultimate place in history. 

Palahniuk knows how to write for multiple voices just as well as he does with his stories that deal with a singular protagonist.  Instead of one person's emotional baggage, we get that of four people.  Four people who constantly interlock and collide as they vie for their own personal moment of fame, which will contribute to Ms. Wright's very own fame itself.  The author explores the themes of fame and aging, as well as just how screwed up your family can make you, in parallel tracks that run at the same time, but ultimately collide in the end.  The wisdom of our parents influences us to do the things we do in life, and not only does Chuck see this, but he exploits it for all of its darkly comedic and dramatic worth.  If anything, this feels like Palahniuk's most sentimental work since I read Choke, the only difference being it eases up on the darkly comedic and veers a little more towards the dramatic.  It's not a mind blower, but Snuff is still an entertaining examination on the twisted condition that is fame, and just what it does to us (and those around us) in the long run.

Up Next: Book Two in the Palahniuk Appreciation Series, Pygmy

Coming Soon: The Epic Summer of 2011!

Ah Summer, the time of surf, skirts, sand, and sweltering heat.  It's also the time of the year that everyone is most relaxed and at the same time most energetic.

What better way to commemorate the Summer than to have another special reading project!  From June 1st until August 31st, it's going to be nothing but epics here at TBK.  For the sake of tracking, here's my definition of an epic:

"A huge story, sprawling wide expanses of distance, time, and/or cast, that is AT LEAST 700 pages."

That in mind, throughout those three months I will be reading nothing but epics.  (Except for a couple of possible comic breaks and the latest Chad Kultgen and Lev Grossman releases.  Have to stay timely somehow.)  There isn't a definitive schedule in the works, but the three tentpoles that are going to hold this marathon up are:

The Passage: A Novel

Infinite Jest


Gone With the Wind

Other than that I've been considering others such as The Stand, A Game of Thrones, Under The Dome, and Drood.  (However, suggestions are welcome for entries in this epic undertaking.)  Epic Summer becomes Epic on June 1st.

The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #7 - The Secret Year by Jennifer R. Hubbard

This isn't Kings of Colorado, I know.  After overloading myself with Jersey Shore literature, I could hardly settle myself into a story of redemption through horses and hard time.  So I moved onto JWoww's book, in hopes that I may slay that beast and be done with the Jersey Shore kids for good.  That didn't happen either.  I couldn't even get through James Franco's short story collection, due to the fatigue I had put myself through.  After the sprint I'd done for the beginning of this quest, I needed something simple.  Something light that would alleviate me of the weight that I had taken on.  In the words of a good friend of mine, I needed something borderline trashy.  What I went with was The Secret Year: a book that's not so much trashy as it is steamy, and even then it is mildly so.

Undoubtedly there is sex in the book, but it's not so smutty that you need to take a shower after reading it.  Our narrator throughout the story is Colten "Colt" Morrissey, a teenage boy who confides to the audience about his secret year long relationship with Julia Vernon.  It's not that Colt and Julia don't like each other, it's just that Colt comes from the poor side of town and Julia is from the rich side.  Now before you say, "Hey, I've read this book before", the book's description itself even sells the book as follows:

"Take Romeo and Juliet. Add The Outsiders. Mix thoroughly."

It's the perfect summary for the story that unfolds as Colt recalls the events that occurred after Julia's death in a drunk driving accident.  Shortly after her funeral, he receives her secret diary, consisting of letters all written out to him.  These letters give Colt insight into what Julia was thinking about during the span of their relationship, as well as how she really felt about him.  What he sees is a portrait of a girl uncertain as to whether she should stay with the boy she truly loves, or continue to date her boyfriend.  As Colt reads on into Julia's thoughts, personal developments end up spurring sociological developments, culminating in a big "rumble" towards the end of the book.

Which is precisely why I can say I like the book, but I don't love it.  For starters, The Secret Year really sells itself on the love story aspect, when it really comes off as a more uneven blend of Hintonesque social tension and romantic entanglements.  That's not to say that the book isn't an enjoyable read, but it's not exactly the most consistent in tone and story.  Also, the book moves so fast that by the end of the novel, I was expecting at least another 10 to 20 pages wrapping things up.  Instead, the book just kind of ends, which is fine if you're trying to use that as a metaphor for the fleeting nature of Julia's life.  By the end of the book, it's as if we truly are in Colten's shoes: we've hit the end of the text, we want to know more about what we've just finished reading, and we're surprised it ended so abruptly. 

The Secret Year starts with a forbidden love, but ends with a rumble, and somehow two plot lines feel like they should have been separated into their own books in order to truly flourish.  It would be nice if Ms. Hubbard could revisit this world, because while it isn't the most polished product (it is a debut novel, after all), it has enough flashes of depth that it would be fun to see her further hone her craft and deliver more tails of The Black Mountain kids and The Flats kids.  If anything, I would like to see her give a little more resolution to poor Colt, because the kid deserves it.

Up Next: Author Appreciation Marathon #1- Chuck Palahniuk.  In no particular order...

 - Snuff

- Pygmy

 - Lullaby

- Choke: A Novel

- Fight Club: A Novel

The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #6 - Here's the Situation: A Guide to Creeping on Chicks, Avoiding Grenades, and Getting in Your GTL on the Jersey Shore by Mike Sorentino with Chris Millis

Mike Sorrentino, aka "The Situation", made a name for himself...and sold the shit out of it.  Using his nickname/catch phrase, he rode to the front of the Jersey Shore cast, being matched only by everyone's "favorite" diminutive dimwit Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi.  Not content with merely being on people's TV screens, "Sitch" decided to "drop the knowledge" on the public in print form.  With his assigned collaborator, he set out to create, "the Bible to the Situation Nation".  I for one can honestly say that if this is the Bible to an entire nation of people, I'm all for starting a good old fashioned crusade.

With only 133 pages to its name, one would assume that this would be a simple book to just walk right through.  That assumption couldn't be further from the truth, as it is the most painful 133 pages I've ever had to read.  Catch phrases, shitty drawings, fake "ab facts", and of course "Real Life Situations"...all are yours for the perusing in this handy volume made for you to "crush".  By the end of this book, the only thing that was crushed was my soul, and that was because of the fact that somewhere, out in the major population sprawl of America, someone thought this was a good idea.  Someone allowed this book to be written.  Someone would have eventually bought it. Scariest of all, someone might actually take this at face value as the "Psychology" book it's being categorized as.   (Here's hoping it's properly reclassified as "Humor" in a couple of years.")

Sorrentino's writing comes off as a blend of pretentiousness and stupidity, making him out to be the biggest bonehead with narcissistic tendencies in quite some time.  (The only competition he'd ever have is if Charlie Sheen writes his autobiography, "Winning".)  It occupies a rather inconvenient middle ground: it's too stupid to laugh at, but it's too funny to completely trash it.  All you really need to take away from this book is one quote: "You can nail the GTL, and the GTL Remix, but you can't fake being a class act."  Oh Sitch...you've proven yourself correctly, if only to your own detriment.  I usually try to keep it classy around here, writing off only the books that deserve it...and this book deserves it.  It's misogynist, it's repetitive, it's the biggest monument to the "Cult of Me!" that most reality stars subscribe to.  If you've asked me to get to the point, I'd sum my feelings up in three words:  Fuck This Book.

Up Next: Kings of Colorado by David E. Hilton

The Cannonball Read III - Osaka Slide: #5 - Across the Universe, by Beth Revis

Science Fiction is an easy genre to screw up, simply because while it's easy to create fiction, the science isn't always there. Teen fiction is an easy genre to screw up because while you're writing for a certain audience, you also have to try and keep your fingers on the pulse of a rather fickle demographic. To combine the two is a tricky situation, because if done wrong it can irrevocably trigger animosity of the highest regard. (I'm looking at you, Ms. Meyer.) Needless to say a lot of authors get it wrong, and we have a marketplace flooded with stories of how some plain teenage girl is in love with a mythical beast and how her life is going to change because of it.  (The Oatmeal has a comic covering this exact phenomenon.)  However if you do it right, then you'll have something that ranges from "a decent read" to "excellent beyond expectation".  Across the Universe is the first Teen Fiction book I've read from someone not names John Green that has given me hope for the genre, as it masterfully blends both genres into something that reads as wonderfully as it sounds.

Amy Martin is part of an expedition to another planet...a planet not unlike Earth.  It's sometime in the future, and things are pretty frakked.  So much so that we've decided to build a generational ship, freeze the essential crew (plus one non-essential family member, Amy herself), and ship them out into the deepest reaches of space on a 301 year mission.  Not a lot of fun, especially when James Cameron got cryo sleep wrong in Avatar.  Not only do you dream, you dream so much that you tire of dreams.  Unfortunately for Amy, she's going to be woken from her dreams about 50 years early, and under mysterious circumstances.  When awoken she meets a boy around her age by the name of Elder, the future leader of the colonists aboard the Godspeed.  Under the tutelage of Eldest, he will learn to lead strong, lead fair, and lead without hesitation.  Or love.  Naturally these two join forces and not only try to solve the mysterious de-frostings, but also the most elusive force of nature ever: teenage hormones.

For a debut author, Beth Revis knows not to overdo the romance or the Sci Fi aspects of her story, thus widening her audience appeal.  By being a more inclusive writer, Revis makes Sci Fi geeks, Teen Romance geeks, and casual readers feel so comfortable and invested in her world that they can hardly tell which genre is taking focus at the time.  And thank gods she wrote her characters like actual people!  Gone is the neutered teenager from the moment Elder sees Amy naked under the ice.  He knows he's attracted, and his mind starts to wander toward some rather naughty thoughts.  (Nothing too bad though, this IS YA lit after all.)

Perhaps the most telling aspect of Ms. Revis's story telling is the usage of split perspectives.  Each chapter alternates between Amy and Elder's perspectives, ultimately weaving the story together so well that while the point of view changes, the story flows perfectly.  The only negative beat I'd give this book is the ending.  There's a big revelation as to the plot of the book, and it's fine that we find out what that twist is.  It's just the revelation of the twist between characters could have been saved for the next book in the proposed trilogy.  All she had to do is end it with the twist being revealed to us, and we'd get a nice cliffhanger to latch onto for the next book.  Nevertheless, it's not a big enough gripe to spoil the enjoyment of this fine book.

Across the Universe makes me further believe that Teen fiction isn't just a wasteland of neutered, brainless shells for readers to populate and live vicariously romantic lives through.  It's books like this that make me feel literature in general is still very much alive and kicking.  In the parlance of the book's society, anyone who doesn't at least read the first few chapters of this book is a frexing idiot.

Next Up: Here's the Situation: A Guide to Creeping on Chicks, Avoiding Grenades, and Getting in Your GTL on the Jersey Shore by Mike Sorentino with Chris Mills